April 16, 2007
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Food and Paperwork
Ok the topic for the second half of the month at Featured_Grownup’s is food and Paper work. Wow.. Right away when I heard the topic I thought of the planning for my daughter’s birthday party that is this Saturday. One of the first steps was paper work, the invites. It also involved finding out that people arent polite anymore and most people no longer RSVP and let you know if they are attending or not. It seems that people have lost the meaning of RSVP, either that or they just don’t think the everyone else should get the same amount of respect that they would like to get. It gets very frustrating. This wasn’t a big problem when I was growing up. I don’t know if that’s because I grew up around mennonites who treated others the way they wanted to be treated or if everyone just had that respect for each other back then.
Well, the whole invitation/RSVP thing brings us to the food issue. How is a person supposed to know how much food to have if people don’t let you know if they are coming? Because of this fact I have decided that we are not having chips. We are not having Ice cream. We are just having Cake. Why? Well, I have had to make sure that I have plenty of cake because we could get as few people as the few who RSVPed or we could end up with her whole school class (which were all invited but one 5 RSVPed) and our relatives.
I have a question for everyone. I would really love to hear the answers.
When you get invited somewhere (party/wedding/etc) do you RSVP and let the person know if you are coming or not? Or do you only let them know if you are coming but not if you arent? Or do you just show up?
Comments (20)
I always RSVP because I hate it when *I’m* giving a party and no one does! I don’t think it’s fair to the hostess to not let her know in advance how many to plan for.
But, like you, no matter how many RSVPs I get, I always plan for a few more. I would never tell anyone they were uninvited if they showed up unexpectedly. And, I’m also guilty of issuing last minute invitations to people I run in to who might want to join in the fun
RYC: I loved that movie, too. I watched it several times, and there are still someparts I don’t understand, but it was a good “made me think” film.
I always respond to an RSVP.
But I agree with the above comment, it’s always better to have too much, than not enough.
It’s very interesting that you write this (I just started planning my wedding) I’ve already written out the list of guests and I already know who is going to be invited and who isn’t going to bother to RSVP. That really grinds my gears, it’s so expensive to do anything anymore, especially plan a wedding that the least you can do so I can save myself a few dollars is let me know. There is just no common courtesy anymore, so I always let people know if I can or can’t make it and if there is anything I can do to help.
If it says RSVP on the invitation, I would probably do so. I know what it means! I would probably only not RSVP if I wasn’t coming; I wouldn’t want to show up unannounced.
LINKED
i rsvp either way………
great post
A very sensible approach to the topic..You proof that food without paperwork can lead to chaos.
I hate it that people have lost their manners and don’t RSVP any more. I always let people know whether I am coming or not. It does make it really hard to plan if you don’t know how many are coming!
the current standard rule is that about 50% of the ppl you invite will show up- rsvp or not. the problem is that if you have a rep for a fun time… ppl won’t rsvp (no matter how much you beg) and you’ll end up like i did for chinese new year w/12 rsvps and 25 ppl attending (out of the 27 i invited!). Luckily, i can never cook for a few so we had plenty of food… just no place to sit!
one thing i’ve done is call all the invitees and see if they’re coming and even then they’ll say yes and be a no-show, or change their mind at the last minute and call to say they’re on their way.
People should RSVP. I have run into this anti-RSVP Phenomena in planning children’s parties. Sometimes I wonder if the invitations all make it home, but really a parent should RSVP for their child. It’s frustrating, I know.
GREAT post. i ALWAYS rsvp and i get pissed (for lack of a better word) when other do not show the same respect. it’s courtesy, it’s polite and it’s the danged party law!
thanks for sharing!
~c
I just had one daughter’s birthday party that was poorly attended (bad time of day) and hardly anyone RSVP’d, although I put on the invitation that because of where it was held, I need to know either way. Getting ready for the next daughter’s birthday party, and I really hope people RSVP/respond better. Although, I was so reminded that I need to be more careful in always responding to invitations I get, and the very next birthday party invitation that we got, and fully planned to attend slipped my mind! I forgot to RSVP OR go! I thought of it 2 hrs after the party. Doh. I blamed Easter plans and other family crisis, but still! ALWAYS RESPOND, either way!!
this is a great post…and I always RSVP…this is called common curtisy (sp)…Smile
I always let the host know if we were coming…too bad it didn’t always work out that way when I was the host.
that does sound complicated. . .
dunno the last time I got a RSVP thing.
My older brother is actually getting married in just over a week. And you know, got the wedding invitation sure (but I haven’t seen it, I need to find where that is in the house and actually take a look at how it LOOKS before the wedding itself! lol)
Food is over-rated anyways, right? Why does everyone social engagement have to have food! Arrgens me. I mean seriously, i just think if you’re having such a good time there’s no need for food.
Be getting enjoyment from your surroundings, the people you’re with. . .not because you’re getting high from shoving such and such tasty morsels in your mouth. . .in your belly. . .
Okay, I feel a little sheepish after this post, I’m guilty of forgetting to RSVP and just showing up. I guess I figured that if they are inviting me, they are planning on me and usually I go to an invited party no matter what, I hate to miss out but from now on, hearing how people feel about it I will definitely RSVP either way.
In my opinion though I think it’s worse to say you are coming to the party and then not showing up, that really pisses me off. I just had a housewarming party and invited everyone and their dog including everyone that was in the play that I was in, we did have a good turnout and I didn’t mind the people that came that didn’t call me because if I invite them I plan on them and if I have a ton of leftover food I know what my lunch is going to be for the next several weeks but almost everyone in my play said that they were coming to my party and not one person from the play showed up. The people that came had a great time and it was a big success but I think its just as rude if not more rude to say you’re going and then for whatever reason not show up.
I try to RSVP. I really do. I have every intention of RSVPing. But in all honesty, sometimes I don’t.
I do rsvp, but in planning parties have run into the same problem… although with family I don’t, at least not formally, but they know I am coming cause I always bring food to help out! LOL….
I inevitably forget to rsvp until the last minute. I can’t do it when I first get it (if it’s still kids’ stuff we’re talking about) because they could end up being grounded and not be able to do… then I end up forgetting until the day before. :: sigh :: [if they are definitely NOT going to go, I rsvp immediately.]
I try really hard to RSVP, but occasionally I do forget. I always feel bad when someone has to call me to ask.